A Life In Review

I’ve started noting the discrepancies between movies and real life more. When you’re a kid you seem to believe anything that happens on TV or in a movie, but the older you get the more laughable things become. That is where the idea for this post comes from. The point of this post isn’t to educate you or make you overanalyze every movie you watch, but to entertain you and maybe even make you laugh today.

I’ll try to keep these short and sweet (you know I can be long winded).

1. Punching Someone: Movies make this seem so easy and flawless. Most of the time the only person who gets hurt is the person who was hit. If you find yourself randomly punching someone when you’ve never hit someone before, you’ll probably break something in your hand or at least bruise it. It definitely won’t be flawless (unless you have some sort of training).

2. Telling Someone Where and When to Meet: In movies when a person needs to meet up with someone, they just tell them a time in place. In reality it would be more of a conversation because people have lives and there’s no way that everyone is free all of the time.

3. There’s Always a Parking Spot: Never in my life have I seen parking done so easily than in movies. There is always a spot available for them. Even in the big cities, which is wild!

4. Death Being Clean: Sure they show the gore in certain movies, but never have I seen them show the dead body covered in urine or feces, because that’s what we would find in real life 🤢🤢.

5. Ending a Phone Call: In almost every movie I’ve ever seen when someone is finished with a call, they just hang up, when in reality it would be extremely rude to just hang up without saying goodbye to someone.

6. Waiting for Change: Have you noticed that when (if) a character pays for something, they never wait for their change. Sometimes they will drop the line “keep the change”, but usually they just walk away.

7. People living in the City on a Part Time Job Salary: Movies always portray this “struggling” character who lives in the big city in their apartment. Have you ever tried to rent in a big city? Working part time won’t even let you afford parking.

8. High School Seniors Owning Cars: In almost every movie I’ve seen with high school seniors, they own cars. I was still driving my parents car in college, so I’m not sure where they found all those parents who trusted their seniors with cars.

9. Cops Arriving in 15 Seconds or Less: Have you ever been around when the cops were called (I hope not, but it’s a valid question). In movies they arrive in record time, but in real life they could be on another call, or they could be farther away. It takes time for them to get there.

10. Pregnant Women going from Water Break to Delivery in Minutes: This one is my favorite. As someone who sat in labor for another LONG while after my water was broken, this always makes me laugh. I’m sure there are a few “lucky” women who deliver right away, but most of the time it’s not that fast.

I had a lot of fun writing this post. My husband hates how much I talk during shows and movies, so it’s been fun to write down all of my comments that he hates (to be fair, I never remember to pause the movie before making my comment). Some of these were also taken from some very old (but still relevant Reddit threads. Did I miss anything important?